I was studying the chapter on relations and functions and the words were sort of bouncing around in my head when I suddenly remembered something I've wanted to rant about for a long time. The relations and functions I'm talking about, however, have very little to do with mathematics. I'm talking about the army of people most Indians have the privilege of calling family and their naming ceremonies, birthdays, coming of age ceremonies, weddings, house warming ceremonies and a couple of other poojas and celebrations thrown in for good measure. It's not that I dislike the events themselves, but I've attended one too many weddings at which I have to whisper in my mom's ear, "So are we on the bride's side or the groom's side of the family?" just before we hand the wedding present over to the happy couple. And if we ever met them again it would be at the next unknown person's wedding. When I think of the money we spend on petrol, the p...